Expectations and frustration

All of us come across many circumstances that frustrate us. We find people behaving quite weirdly, many rules to be archaic and out of place, many systems to be quite out of sync with reality, exploitation of the haves not by the haves, and manipulation of the rules and procedures to grant undue benefits to certain individuals, interest groups and pressure groups interfering with the public policies, kids moving on the self-damaging path quite reluctant to take the advice, people fighting for trivial issues, undue favor to a colleague due to sycophancy,  racial discriminations and so on. There would be thousands of reasons for frustration in the day to day life.

Whatever the reason for frustration, there is one single underlying cause and that is expectation. We develop certain expectations and not only do we develop these expectations, but we also get attached to those expectations. We expect that we will be able to continue with what we have and achieve what we desire and a harmonious system to help us achieve all our intended outcomes. However, life generally gives us surprises quite often. As our expectations are broken, we feel frustrated.

Probably there are two possible ways and means to handle frustration. The first one is a worldly method whereby we set expectations intelligently in a pragmatic manner. If we know that we are not intelligent enough to beat a competitive exam, rather than getting frustrated with the result, we set our expectations right and prepare for an exam that we can clear. We aim for what we can achieve. However, the dividing line between fear and intelligence is quite blurred and what appears to be a decision driven by intelligence may always be a decision full of fear. Thus, we may end up living a life far below our potential. Not only that, intelligence depends upon the availability of information, and in most life situations, we are caught by surprises. Most of the factors in the decision-making process are quite abstract and an objective measurement of these factors is not possible.

There is another possible way also. We may avoid frustration by not setting the expectations at all. A natural question would arise as to how is possible to be motivated to work in the absence of expectation. It is the expected result that keeps us motivated. I feel that it may happen only when we see the temporariness of all the results. Each expected result gives rise to a pleasant sensation in our body. We want more and more of these pleasant sensations and the expectation of such sensations keeps us motivated.

Is there a possibility of not having expectations at all and in that case what will be the motivation? I feel that it is a possibility. However, that possibility has quite a low probability. Very difficult until and unless a person realizes the temporariness of all the sensations. Mere intellectual understanding of the temporariness of the sensations is not sufficient. There has to be a realization at the level of experience. Even one one-time experience is not very helpful. That awareness has to be there in each moment. 

Only in the moments of the awareness of the temporariness of these pleasant and unpleasant sensations, can one make decisions without getting affected by the expectations. In these moments of awareness, one will make decisions without categorizing the outcomes into good and bad. Rather he will make the decisions considering only the pure potential of the consciousness. Like a player willing to explore the fullest of his potential while playing the game. Not having any competition with anybody except oneself. Not playing the game with the expectation to win a medal but rather playing the game to explore one's potential. In such cases, the expected outcome is not the reward but rather exploration of the inner potential is itself a reward. In fact, in such cases, one can never foresee the results because they are beyond the known forms. It is the pure creative potential that gives rise to something quite unknown and therefore there is no question of setting an expectation and getting frustrated for not being able to achieve the expected outcome.