Emotional void

Human beings are primarily emotional beings and their life is driven by emotions. However, many times, we experience a situation of emotional void wherein there is a numbness of emotions. In these situations, the brain is almost dull and there are almost no thoughts lingering in the brain. 

Before a person starts his spiritual journey, one or the other ambition drives life. It may be an ambition to get a good job, or career, set up a business, have friends, take care of family, or have positions, power, or fame. Sometimes, a person's life may be driven by more than one such ambition. Sometimes these ambitions may be conflicting and other times they support each other. These ambitions form the core of existence and the entire life revolves around them. 

So long as life is driven by ambitions, one's mind is quite clear. He is just running after these ambitions without a second thought. One's perspective is singular. One is quite certain. However, as one moves along the spiritual path, one starts realizing the relativity of different perspectives. This creates confusion. One is no longer sure which direction to move and probably this confusion remains till one starts listening to the inner voice quite clearly.

While moving along the spiritual path, one often faces situations wherein one is not able to decide. This is because the dividing line between right and wrong, like and dislike, and good and bad is slowly getting blurred. The signposts that used to guide so far on the path of life, no longer carry any signs. In such a situation, the mind no longer remains sure of the algorithm it has been using so far to make decisions in life. Even if it uses its childhood algorithm, that takes it nowhere. As if it is trying to solve a tricky puzzle wherein the standard methods learned so far are not working and the puzzled brain is just lost in a void waiting for the solution to come from some unknown corner.

I feel that this is a necessary phase, one has to pass through in the spiritual journey. Ears that have gotten used to listening to loud music take some time to switch off from that loudness, after the loud music is off, to reconnect to the music of nature. That connection with the divine is not so easy to establish and retain in a world full of loudness. The loudness has so many forms that it is almost impossible to get out of its grip. The world has an infinite range of loud emotions that keep taking control over the mind in one form or the other. Therefore such phases of emotional void, howsoever uncomfortable they may be, are the blessings of God and have to be appreciated by the spiritual seekers.